Past is a privacy.

Over the last weekend, I learned a few important lessons of life. First and the most important one was to leave your past behind and don\’t give it another chance. The second lesson was that everyone has a few relatives, who might be a bit more distant but better than those who are more deeply related. The last one, there is nothing better than a chit-chat with cousins who make you feel loved. I also experienced something strange on Saturday evening. Along with my cousins, I was at the famous Kozhikode beach when we saw our own shadow on thin air! I repeat thin air. We thought it was just some illusion and therefore we went back and tried again. When the car was coming at 90 degree from our right, with bright lights, we could see our shadow again on thin air! None of us have ever experienced anything similar before and we kept wondering about the science behind it. It still remains a mystery like the question Rameshan asked in \’1983\’, why do you see rainbow when light pass through rain drop?.

I think this happens to quite a lot of people, you fall for some sentimental talks by a person from your past and your heart melts to help them out and then you fall in trouble. The intensity of trouble may differ from person to person but the feeling of hurt would be almost, if not exactly, the same. Speaking from personal experiences, distributing second chances is not an appreciable thing to do but at the same time, it can be good if the person truly deserves it. I shared a close friendship with someone who later turned out to be the person whom I hate the most. But after few years, she texted me and befriended me again with an aplogy. I didn\’t have to think twice before thinking about a second chance with her because I know it was all misunderstandings and the immaturity which ruined our friendship. But this is not the same case everytime. I learned that possibly in the toughest manner ever. The past should always be left as past. Just don\’t look back. Take it as an experience and move ahead. When a new person enters your life, the first thing you should tell them is \”Don\’t ask me about my past. When I feel, you should know any part of it, I will tell you.\” Always, I repeat ALWAYS, select people in your life who care about your present and love you for who you are. Don\’t change for anyone and lose your identity.

Quotes like life is too short to have a look back and regret are usually seen. But surely, nobody pays attention to those unless someone who has experienced it. There have been moments in my life when I miss a sibling and a true friend. But slowly with experience and confidence, I found the true friend within myself. Ever since then, I have become more confident to look up straight and walk. When my ex texts me, I don\’t find my heart racing to reply to her anymore. I know its my past and there is no turning back towards it, even if it is just as a friend. I tell myself \”You don\’t have to reply to her so fast anymore. She is not your priority anymore.\” I built this in myself after going through a lot of hard moments. This has also helped me to balance my emotions and feelings for everyone around. When I am in the mood to work, I don\’t get disturbed by any personal messages beeping on my phone. I extended this quality to times when I am not working also. These small things are helping me in a big way to become more focused.

Yesterday I saw a status update on Facebook which says if one person\’s conversation is always at the top of your whatsapp chat, then he or she is very important to you. After reading that, I kept an eye on my whatsapp list  and for the last 30 hours or so, I realized I did have one chat at the top five everytime. No, its not my girlfriend or crush. Its not my best friend either. But its someone whom gives me so much of happiness when we text and cares for me like a true friend, a true sister.

This blog is more an autobiographical account. I purposefully write about my own experiences because I don\’t want anyone to go through the tough times I went and also I am also a little hopeful, someone would gain something from my write ups. Wondering what this whole blog was about? Oh well, its simple; 

Don\’t look back at your past and waste your time. You have a future smiling at you. Walk ahead. Don\’t run away from trouble. Face it, make yourself strong and try finding a trusty friend in yourself.